Neglected, Once Again

I don't know why I forget to write over here.

Life has been busy lately. I have a feeling it's just going to get busier with the upcoming holidays. Over the weekend, Brandi put up the Christmas decorations around the house. She did a pretty good job, too. We still have to put up the tree, and for the first time in a really long time, I am not looking forward to it. I think it's because I hate where we live, and it's hard to be festive when the paint is peeling off the ceilings and you are constantly removing slugs from the kitchen floor.

But, this weekend, we will put it up, and it will be beautiful. Brandi's birthday is next Friday, Kasi has several chorus concerts coming up, we still haven't really Christmas shopped for the kids, I have baking to do for tomorrow and Thursday...I am just completely overwhelmed, but in a good way. The busier I am, the faster the next three months will go, and the faster we will get out of this hell hole.

Deep breath.

I have been doing good. I got to see New Moon last Friday with Missy, and we had a blast. the movie was awesome, and I spent the day with no kids, which NEVER happens. It was wonderful. I am still holding steady at 35 pounds lost, and am hoping to make it through the holidays without weight gain. I really want to lose some more weight, and know that I will have to work for it. Losing what I have because of stress was not healthy, and I want to do this the right way. I am still feeling good about myself, which is new for me.

Junior and I missed last therapy session, and will have to cancel this Wednesday, too. Kasi has to go back to the dermatologist to get her stitches out, and hopefully the toxicology report will be back so we can find out what she has growing back there. The ointment that I have been rubbing in twice a day seems to be helping, but she still has a ways to go before it is all gone. I miss talking to Cindy, and we were supposed to have that new therapist sit in, too. Hopefully we can schedule something for next week instead of having to wait for another two.

Things have been quiet around here...no drama, which is wonderful. The kids are happy, Junior and I are great, as always. It's so nice to not have any negativity in our lives. It really does make a difference when you surround yourself with people who lift you up, instead of people who constantly tear you down.

On that note, I am going to finish cooking my pancakes in cafe world.

Relaxed

Aside from kasi's little adventure, we had a wonderful camping trip. We swam, we fished, we tanned. I can not remember the last time I just did nothing. And I mean N O T H I N G! When we got up Thursday morning, it was about 9. We ran and got ice for the coolers, and were back and in the lake by 10. I spent all day swimming and floating around on my float. I cooked burgers on the grill for lunch, and hot dogs for supper. The kids ate whenever they wanted, whatever they wanted. I can not remember the last time they went so long without arguing.

I can not even begin to explain the feeling of helplessness that I felt when kasi fell into the fire pit. I didn't know what to do for her. She wanted ice, which I later found out was a bad idea. I did the only thing I could...I got her to the hospital. It's so hard knowing there is nothing you can do to make your child better. Luckily, it never really hurt...my mom told my sister she could have burned the nerves, which would block the pain. They gave her some lortab at the hospital, more for themselves, I think. They kept telling her it was okay if she said it hurt, because it SHOULD hurt. That was the first time she has ever taken a pain pill like that, and she was quite loopy. It did help her sleep, which is what she needed. I thank God that she didn't burn her face, because that's how she fell...face first. She put out her arm to protect her face. It was also luck that she didn't fall into the flame. That would have been really bad.

We call Kasi klutz, because she is always falling and stuff. This was typical Kasi, falling like she did. Earlier in the day, when they were at the park, she fell chin first into the ground, and skinned her chin and both knees. It's amazing that she has yet to break a bone.

Friday, I felt so bad for her. I was ready to come home so she would be more comfortable. She insisted that we stay. She couldn't get wet, but she put her feet in the water and fished.

Anyway, I remembered what it felt like to have no worries. For four days, I didn't worry about the bills. I didn't worry about how many comments I was getting on my blog. I didn't stress over the fact that I fell off the front page of entrecard because I didn't drop for four days. I wasn't checking the computer every thee minutes for open opps.

I enjoyed my family. They are the four most important people in my life, and it felt wonderful to give them all of my attention. Kasi and I played cards, Brandi and I found critters (I have pictures of her snail and turtle and frog) and Ryan and I swam the lake.

I can not wait to go back next year.

Shall I Ramble Again?

Got on the scale again this morning...down another 3 pounds. Must have been the workout my fat behind got on Saturday helping my brother. I'm not complaining...I like the numbers going down...I just need to keep them going in that direction.

Did a little shopping for Kasi's party today. I am getting excited to see everyone...missy, you're still coming, right?...I just hope it doesn't rain. It rained in October, and we learned then that my house is just too small for so many people...besides, I want the kids to be able to get wet. I have water balloon plans...sshhhhhh.....

I have so much to do cleaning this house, too, but I always wait until the last minute. Friday I want to get all the food ready, and Saturday I need to get the yard done. I need to send an email asking people to bring their own outdoor chairs...I don't have enough. We weren't able to borrow the sno cone machine, but saw one in wal-mart for $15 we might get...we have the syrup left over from October...that stuff doesn't go bad, right, if i keep it in the fridge? Maybe I'll just get some more....

Too many decisions to make!

Mental Block

For some reason, I can not remember to put my pedometer on in the morning. This is getting ridiculous. I was doing so good, too, with all my steps. I need to remember.

Today was a sad day at our house. If you read any of my other blogs, you know we had to have Bob put down. Poor Brandi was so upset, as was Junior. Bob was always his cat, and it broke his heart that he is gone. I am tearing up just writing this.

Kasi stayed home from school today. Her entire class went to Myrtle Beach. I was not comfortable sending her that far with the school so she got to take a personal day today. She spent it on the couch, watching movie after movie. I sat and listened to Redeye...I love that movie...but then had to put my headphones on. I can not handle some of the shows she likes.

As for me, same as always. Need to do better....